AccelePrep for the ACT Test 2nd Edition Student Text

316 • A PPENDIX

examples of uses of plastic bags but does not explain that these activities make plastic bags a less wasteful product. • Š‡ –Š‹”† „‘†› ’ƒ”ƒ‰”ƒ’Šǡ ‹ ’ƒ”–‹…—Žƒ”ǡ…‘–ƒ‹• ƒ •—’‡”ϐ‹…‹ƒŽ ƒ”‰—‡–Ǥ Š‡ ™”‹–‡” †‘‡• ‘– acknowledge that activities like driving and cooking are necessary parts of one’s daily life, whereas there is a feasible alternative to using plastic bags. Organization: • The organization of the essay is clear and easy to follow. The writer states his or her thesis in the introduction, and each body paragraph has a topic sentence. • The writer uses transitions, but the transitions sometimes sound repetitive and awkward. For example, both the second and third body paragraphs begin with the transition “also.” The writer needs to vary –”ƒ•‹–‹‘• –‘ ƒ‡ –Š‡ ‡••ƒ› ϐŽ‘™ ‘”‡ •‘‘–ŠŽ›Ǥ Language Use and Conventions: • The essay contains several weaknesses in this area: • The essay contains some usage and mechanics errors. 1. –”‘†—…–‹‘ǣ  –Š‡ ϐ‹”•– •‡–‡…‡ǡ Dz‹–•dz •Š‘—Ž† „‡…Šƒ‰‡† –‘ Dz‹–ǯ•Ǥdz ȋ š’Žƒ‹ –Šƒ– Dz‹–•dz ‹• –Š‡ possessive form, and “it’s” means “it is.”) 2. –”‘†—…–‹‘ǣ  –Š‡ Žƒ•– •‡–‡…‡ǡ Dzƒˆˆ‡…–dz •Š‘—Ž† „‡…Šƒ‰‡† –‘ Dz‡ˆˆ‡…–Ǥdz ȋ š’Žƒ‹ –Šƒ– —•—ƒŽŽ›ǡ “affect” is a verb and “effect” is a noun.) 3. ‘†› ’ƒ”ƒ‰”ƒ’Š ʹǣ Š‡ •‡…‘† •‡–‡…‡ Šƒ• ƒ…‘ƒ •’Ž‹…‡Ǥ ȋ ‘ˆ–‡ —•‡ –Š‡ ƒ• –”ƒ•Š „ƒ‰•ǡ since they’re waterproof, they’re very useful for this purpose.) The writer should begin a new sentence after “bags” or replace the comma with a semicolon. 4. ‘†› ’ƒ”ƒ‰”ƒ’Š ͵ǣ  –Š‡ ϐ‹ƒŽ •‡–‡…‡ǡ Dz–Š‡”‡•dz •Š‘—Ž† „‡…Šƒ‰‡† –‘ Dz–Š‡”‡ǯ•Ǥdz • The essay contains many examples of informal language. For example, in the conclusion, the writer says, “this wouldn’t work in the US.” Instead, the writer should say, “banning non-reusable bags would not be practical in the US.” • The essay also uses repetitive language. For example, the introduction states that “Shopping bags are really convenient for shoppers.” The writer should use a synonym for “shoppers,” such as “consumers,” to avoid sounding repetitive. Summary and Conclusions: The essay has a clear thesis and three main arguments. However, the writer does not use developed reasoning or a variety of examples to support these arguments. Furthermore, the writer does not consider the opposing viewpoints. This essay would likely receive a score of 5.